Congratulations on Indulging Your Latent Fantasy!

After the disastrous events of yesterday, wherein your cousin drunkenly made out with you at her brother’s wedding, you felt pretty rotten. So rotten you just didn’t want to get out of bed (the hangover helped). So today when you wake up you’ll decide not to go to work. Instead you’ll opt to just roll over and stay in bed.

You won’t even bother calling in sick to work – you’ll figure they owe you a little worry and a day off. So you literally won’t move a muscle until 10 AM, when the muscle reflex of awakening at 7 AM every day for the last three years finally kicks in and screams at you to move your filthy arms and legs and fly out from under your covers.

You’ll compromise, hurling an arm out to one side of your bed and picking up your laptop, which landed next to you after you spent the night looking at porn and crying, trying to figure out how you’d deal with the next family function.

When you open the laptop your Gmail account will still be open to your inbox. But unlike last night, when all it had were OkayCupid messages from lady suitors of varying unsuitability who you had reviewed previously, this morning it will have an unread message. It will be from your cousin, and it will read:

Sorry about yesterday. I feel awful. Maybe this will make it up to you ;)

It will contain four attachments. Each of the attachments will be a picture of your cousin, posing for the camera at various angles. One will consist of her pouting as she looks up at the lens, breasts exposed, pushed upward by the hand that isn’t holding the camera. Another will simply be her, standing in front of a mirror, hands covering her private parts. It will be unclear how this picture was taken, if it was done by an ex-boyfriend, a close friend, or using a time lapse. A third image will show her facing away from the mirror, towards the camera, leaning forward, lips pursed. And the last one will show her plunging her fingers into her vagina while her free hand dangles a finger on her lips.

She’ll look very, very interested in all of them.

You’ll sit there for a few minutes processing just what these pictures consist of. You’ll consider incest, and wonder: is it incest if it’s with another girl?

As you wonder, you’ll become aroused and, by the time 10:15 rolls around, you’ll have begun masturbating furiously. By 10:25 you’ll be finished, computer clasped to your breast. By 10:30 you’ll be asleep again, computer pressed against your breasts, the heat gingerly exciting your nipples. You won’t be thinking about morality then, you’ll just feel warm and cozy and like someone in your family really loves you and gets you, which is just what you’ll need after the horror of yesterday.

Congratulations on Indulging Your Latent Fantasy!