You’ve always been a bit ashamed of not having completed your degree. You gave it a shot a good many times, studying at Oxford, Harvard and even ITT. But you’ve always had an ailing relative or a meth problem or a crazy girlfriend who sabotaged your life and stole all your credit cards.
Which is why it’s going to be such a big deal when you complete vocational school next Thursday, covered in blood and chanting in Sanskrit for a demon goddess to bless you with the power of her thousand unnameable young. You’ll stand proud amongst the few other DeVry students who didn’t succumb to madness or worse, become enslaved by the demons.
Now you’ve just got to find a job with a small warlocking firm and start working your way up in the world. It’s a competitive industry, but with the skills you’ve developed and the pride you’ve found through your studies you’ll be prepared to sink that sacrificial dagger into your boss’ belly when the time comes so that you can take his place.
It wasn’t an easy path to tread, but you’ve done it. So congratulations on finishing up vocational school. Now get out there into the world and make us and your demon masters proud!
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