Saturday, December 3, 2011

Congratulations Hilarious Executive!

You’re an executive and you’re hilarious.

“Stock prices are down,” you’ll say, before letting a snake out of a can of corn nuts.

The board room will go crazy, doubling over with laughter.

“Thank you,” you’ll tell them. Then you’ll shoot yourself in the temple to escape the shame of running a failing company.

They’ll all continue laughing until you’ve been dead for almost a full minute. Then one of them will stumble up to you and shake you. Then he’ll realize what’s happened and laugh even harder.

“Always was such a great joker,” he’ll say as he picks the gun up out of your hand, cleans it off and shoots himself in the temple to make it look like murder suicide instead of just murder.

The rest of the board room will follow suit in order of seniority until only one person, a junior executive in the company, remains laughing hysterically at what has transpired.

Congratulations Hilarious Executive!

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