It’s your little girl’s sixth birthday and today you’re going to bake her a cake. Unfortunately you specialized in erotic cake-craft during your time in culinary arts school and, as a result, have to concentrate intensely to make a cake that doesn’t look like a set of breasts or a penis or a man and a woman having sex. And for those without children it can be very difficult to concentrate during the time immediately surrounding your spawn’s birth celebration.
So it’ll come as absolutely no surprise when you open the oven to see a smiling cartoon penis staring back at you. You’ll consider driving to Carvel and purchasing a new store bought cake for your little girl, then decide against it after you recall the sheer amount you’ve had to drink over the last four hours and the fact that you can’t remember if Carvel is still in business.
After a lengthy period of internal monologue and deliberation you’ll just decide to fuck it and talk to your daughter about human sexuality, art, and how objects are just objects while eating some of the most delicious yellow food cake shaped into a penis that anyone will have ever crammed down their gullets.
It will be a tremendous hit.
Congratulations on Baking A Cake!
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