Today you’re going to be walking down the street when a flaming eye ball flies down at you from the sky.
“Holy shit!” you’ll exclaim as the eyeball loops lazily around you, sputtering flames every few seconds.
“Hey there!” the eyeball will say affably, continuing its lazy flight path around you. “How’s it going?”
You’ll leap to the ground. “Oh god, let me live!”
The eyeball will laugh. “That’s the idea! I’m your guardian angel!”
You’ll scream. “What did I do to deserve this?”
The eyeball will laugh in response. “Thought about your step-daughter while masturbating!”
For the next week and a half the eyeball will be your constant watchdog, making sure you don’t think impure thoughts, don’t eat meat and, above all else, don’t touch your step-daughter, you fucking pervert. If you do he’ll return to the Order of Thrones with the knowledge that you did so and then you’ll get a visit from an angel with seven heads and arms and swords and dicks who specializes in dealing with people like you.
Congratulations on Meeting an Angel!
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