Your culture has had some real gets. Like the movie Role Models, that was huge for you guys. It made you seem like interesting people with a weird habit that normal people could enjoy. You’ve had your share of PR blows, like the lightning bolt guy, the SCA and the general state of your internet culture, but you’ve been riding high. Nowadays you can tell people that you LARP and they’ll just get really quiet instead of bursting out laughing.
Well today life is going to get a whole lot more interesting for you when a huge part of the Tea Party joins your community. They’ll do so, as is their way, with at best a loose grasp of the framework governing it, largely entering it as a means of training their mostly obese body politic for the rigors of surviving even a bloodless coup. They’ll also be excited at the prospect of eating mutton off the shank.
They’ll show up and act like absolute dicks, trying to make arbitrary rules based on how they believe other people should play their characters. They’ll generally alienate other groups and try to ruin the game for everyone just because there are some parts they find kind of confusing. They’ll make a kingdom called “America,” which they claim cannot be invaded regardless of circumstance, wherein magic no longer exists and maid may not lay with maid as such it offensive to their imagined king, who presides over their actions from the sky.
The many guilds of LARPing will unite under one banner to show them just how wrong they are. The bean bags will fly, the foam blades clash, but it will not be much of a fight. In the end the Tea Parties will lay broken, declaring that this is no longer fun for anyone. They’ll pout and leave, only a handful of them remaining, having found the entire experience pretty enjoyable. They’ll help you clean up and find guilds they particularly enjoyed being savaged by, joining them and continuing to participate in sanctioned events for years to come.
Congratulations Live Action Role Players! You’ll have allegorically saved America!
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