Congratulations Weird Book in an Attic!

Long have you rested in the deep dark dank of the up upstairs, unmolested and unseen by the people who people your people-holder.  The deep dark dank has been a lonely space for you to sit in, but you are unconcerned with notions of companionship: to be alone in the deep dark dank can be pleasant, a sort of rest, a respite from the things you've seen and heard, the things you've brought to this mortal plane.

Alas, today your solace will be interrupted.  It will be interrupted, as it so often is, by a band of teens looking for a place to dry hump.  Said teens will creep into your attic and, after an especially vigorous dry hump, knock you to the ground.  The noise will draw their attention, interrupting their posturing at coupling and causing them to rise to their feet and approach the spot where you've fallen.  You've have landed, as you always do, in just the right fashion so that the pages for The Spell will be open, face down, sustaining the well creased spine that such incidents will have given you over the years.  One of the teens, the young girl, whose name will be Jenny and whose greatest sin will have been once touching the penis of a young man in a church parking lot during services, will pick you up and begin to read out of a combination of curiosity and compulsion.

The words, once they begin to tumble out of her, will simply feel wrong, but she'll find herself unable to stop.  It will be as if an alien force has taken control of her, and, as the words tumble out, you'll see in her eyes that she'll know what these words mean: her doom is coming.

When she finishes speaking the odor will overtake the room almost instantaneously.  The young boy, Brad, whose greatest sin will have been raping an unconscious young woman in the back seat of a car during a party, will make a flippant comment, implying that the young woman farted, or produced something similar to a fart.

The Voice of the Morningstar will laugh, and inform the young man that he is incorrect.  The Voice will intone that the young man is quite incorrect, but that he needn't worry; he won't have much time to feel guilt over it.

As the words settle in the room a barbed red phallus will rip through the boy's chest, initiating a sequence of carnage you know all too well.  It would seem horrifying to those who have never witnessed the like before, but after millennia of this sort of thing it'll simply be hum drum for you.  You'll let loose a sigh as Lucifer begins to savage the young man as the girl looks on, terrified, but you won't even be able to muster sympathy for the poor, fairly innocent young woman.  After all, she'll be dead when all this is over, while you'll be left here to clean all of this up.

Congratulations Weird Book in an Attic!