Congratulations Coffee Grinding Expert!

"One espresso, please."

You'll nod at her before cramming the beans in your mouth and grinding your teeth.  Hard.

It'll take about fifteen minutes.  It'll hurt, a lot.  She'll look at you like she's disgusted.  But when you spit those finely ground beans into one of those tamper things and filter boiling water through the liquid and pass it to her in a tiny little cup she'll take just one sip and her whole face will light up.

"This is the best coffee I've ever tasted," she'll say to you in a startled whisper.

You'll know, from the look on her face and the tone of her voice, that you could have her, right then and there, on the coffee shop's counter, if you wanted her.  You're that good at making coffee using the tools that god gave you.  You'll know that, if you took her, she'd follow you for years, watching your go through this disgusting ritual with hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands more customers until finally jealousy eroded her wonder at your ability to process coffee.  You'll know that, at some point, she'll leave you, revolted at what she once loved in you, your ability to be everything to the multitude of people who happen to walk into the store you work in.

And, knowing this, you'll still find it hard to simply nod at her, turn to face the next person in line and say "What can I get you?"

But you'll know it's the right thing, you'll know that it's your duty, and there will be some slight solace in this knowledge.

Congratulations Coffee Grinding Expert!