You’ll receive the award early this afternoon from an anonymous man in a suit. He’ll call you by name and hand it off to you with a pair of tongs, taking great care to avoid touching you in any fashion. After that he’ll issue a brief statement of thanks and depart the bus, vanishing in a crowd a few minutes later.
You’ll be baffled until you read the single word “Dirtiest” on the trophy. You’ll be wearing your cutoffs, a visibly displayed thong and a white tee shirt stained with sweat and what we assume is semen. At that point it’ll all make sense and you’ll nod to yourself as you continue to look around the bus, considering the potential of various travelers as sexual partners.
Congratulations on Being Voted Dirtiest!
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