As the knife swishes down, she won't twitch, won't even
move. She'll remain completely inert,
unaware of your presence.
She'll be victim number 471, your four hundreth and seventy
first victim since you decided, ages ago, to start climbing through windows
late at night and stealing ladies hair.
Why do you do this?
Sexual gratification of course!
Do the women ever notice?
Sometimes, if they don't have a lot of hair to start with.
Why dirty hair?
Because it's creepier!
Will this woman notice?
No!
You will, by this point in the story, notice that you have
an awful lot of questions about the thing you do to arouse yourself. It is recommended, then, that you, at this
point, look in the mirror of the woman you are stealing hair from and ask your
reflection "Are you a cop?" If
your reflection is, in fact, a cop, it will have to tell you so. If it remains silent, you'll be in the
clear. And if the woman wakes up at the
sound of your voice, you'll just have to pretend you're a hat rack, the way you
did when your mother had sex while you were standing behind her bedroom door
that one time, when you were young, back before you cut women's hair off in
order to achieve sexual gratification.
You're well practiced at pretending to be a hat rack.
Congratulations Dirty Hair Bandit!
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