Congratulations Chocolate Factory Wolfgang!

There are a lot of godawful factory jobs in America, and do you know why?  The fucking middle man.  Middle men ruin everything.  They ruin movies, with their foul previews.  They ruin business deals, with their ten percents.  They ruin drug exchanges by getting greedy and making things go awry.  But most of all, more than anything else, they ruin workplaces by managing them poorly.

Not you.

You're Wolfgang.  You run a chocolate factory.

"Hallo!" you'll shout at two employees making out with one another as you walk in the door early this morning.

They'll both turn bright red and pretend to go back to work, but you'll wait, poised delicately just behind a chocolate vat, until they think you're gone so that you can watch them get back to making out. You'll smile and chuckle to yourself, muttering about how "Wolfgang has done it again," which won't really make sense in context, but will be super endearing, so we won't judge you for it.

Later on that day, when you're filling out time sheets, you'll fill in "making out" in the space where those employees claimed they were inspecting chocolate vat seals.  When you show that time sheet to your supervisor, he'll insist that you reprimand those employees and assign them to different wings of the factory to insure no further workplace fraternization occurs.  You'll stand up, slam your fist on the table, and shout at him:

"NIEN!  I am a manager of love, a manager who does not merely make a product, but a process that makes a product.  So long as those lovers love, their chocolate, it will be delicious, it will be delightful, and it will be perfect.  So I will do no such thing until their love sours, and in its souring, it begins to damn the chocolate, for you cannot make chocolate without that most fundamental ingredient."

You'll pause for dramatic effect.

"Love."

Your supervisor will start to cry, and you'll stand up, walk across the desk, and embrace him, patting him on the back, making soothing noises.  He will not contest your decisions any further, at least not that day.

Congratulations Chocolate Factory Wolfgang!