"So that's the idea," you'll say, throwing the
binder full of graphs that simply read 'profit' at your potential
investors. One will raise his hand, and
you'll answer him with a quick point.
"Doesn't this sound kind of illegal?" he'll ask.
"Dubbint this spund bewiggle?" you'll murmur,
mocking him. Then you'll make a fart
sound and give him the middle finger. An
older gentleman in a suit will stand up, raise his hand, and begin to speak
without prompting.
"I think the gentleman raised a good point. I think we'd all like an-"
"FUCK YOOOOOU!" you'll interject, throwing your
pocket square at the speaker. It'll
strike him in the face, then tumble to the ground. He'll look puzzled, so you'll follow up with
a quick "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE" at him. He'll take the hint after that and leave,
looking dejected, along with around three fourths of your room. Only your gram mam and her friends will still
be there.
She'll be asleep, but after a quick jostling from her buddy Bea,
she'll come to and murmur, "It sounds lovely, honey. How much money do you need?"
"Twenty million pounds," you'll say in your most
stentorian stage voice.
"Oh lovely," she'll say, withdrawing her checkbook
from her purpose. It's nice to have a
gam gam that loves you so much that she's willing to bankroll your horrible
idea for a reality show called Totswap singlehandedly. She's a classy lady, your gam maw.
Congratulations Tot Swapper!
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