For years you’ve been telling people that Jews have been
conspiring to keep you from producing your product of choice: pork cookies.
“I didn’t know that was a real product,” the clerk filing
your suit against “Jews” will tell you.
“EXACTLY!” you’ll scream at her, spittle flying from your
lips to land on her face. “BECAUSE OF
JEWS!”
She’ll wipe herself clean and shrug, then go back to filing
your lawsuit.
Two weeks later the case will be thrown out of court after
it is noted that it is both racist and establishes too broad a standing for an
effective class action lawsuit.
“You cannot expect every Jew to pay you money,” the judge
will explain. “Only an insane person
would think that’s an actual possibility of an effective means of restitution
for any kind of wrongdoing.”
“FUCKING JEW TOY!” you’ll scream at him, hurling your shoe
at his face. That little stunt will land
you with a two weeks for contempt wrist slap charge. Unfortunately, during that time you’ll be
brutally sodomized to death by a group of burly Jewish men whose bodies are
adorned with Stars of David. So even
though you’ll die as horribly as you possible could expect to, you’ll die as
the victim of an actual Jewish conspiracy.
So that’s kind of good for you, we guess.
Congratulations Pork Cookie Manufacturer!
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