Thursday, July 21, 2011

Congratulations Dodo Lover!

Most dodo lovers are people with a profound respect for the natural world and birds in general, people who find the story of dodos tragic and edifying. They view it as a tragic tale of man’s hubris and the violence man perpetuates against the natural world, and they’re definitely not janitors who work at prominent natural history museums who are turned on by stuffed dodos. Which is exactly what you are.

So tonight you’re going to shock no one at all and stick your dick in a dodo. It’s what you do most nights when you don’t think anyone is watching.

“Uhh!” you’ll moan as you rub your dick against the dodo’s sand filled vagina. “Nah nah nah nuh!”

The dodo won’t respond.

You’ll be doing this for around forty minutes when one of your co-workers walks in and sees you.

“Fuck!” you’ll shout at him as he stands there, horrified at what you’re doing. “Don’t you knock!”

He’ll shake his head and back out of the room, wondering just what he should do. After twenty minutes he’ll decide that telling the manager is the right thing in this scenario and he’ll head off to do just that. A day later you’ll be fired, but at least you’ll have a great story behind how it happened.

Congratulations Dodo Lover!

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