Congratulations Insanely Bad Choice Criminal!

You're a criminal.  I mean, we all are, in a sense, but you're really, really criminally.  You rob, kidnap and kill for money.  You rarely work on spec, you often get caught, and you rarely find yourself outside of prison for more than a few months at a time.

Well, today all that's going to change when you kidnap the creepy son of a wealthy woman.

"Wait, isn't this the plot of some movie?" you might ask.

It's entirely possible!

You and your crime buddies (along with your crime girlfriend) will take the creepy little kid to a shack in the woods to keep him safe.

"Real safe," your crime buddy will tell you.  "Like, unbelievably safe."

You'll agree.  You're a criminal who makes bad choices.  Who are you to say things like "Maybe we should just get a storage space" or "perhaps storing him in an innocuous location in the city might be a good idea."

No, you'll just go along for the ride, until the weird psychic kid starts referring to you and your friends by name, and then starts mind-killing you one by one while his wolf friend watches and licks his genitals in glee.

Eventually, you'll shoot someone with something and then the creepy kid will be dead, but until then, we look forward to watching you work, exceptionally dumb criminal.  It's people like you who make us all believe that there's hope for us in the world.

Congratulations Insanely Bad Choice Criminal!