Congratulations on Alienating Tim Curry!

There aren’t many people in Hollywood more recognizable and accessible than Tim Curry. A veteran of camp and classic film, most people can’t imagine projects that Mr. Curry wouldn’t deign to associate himself with. Need a giant talking penis to be your villain in an upcoming film and want someone great at acting to play him? Call Tim. Want a hilarious Russian man to tell you what you’re doing in a video game? Tim. A wondrous human being to portray Rasputin in an oddball romantic comedy that recasts his political machinations in the Russian court as a madcap romance between a married woman and the executive of a film studio? Mister Curry can deliver.

There are pitiful few roles this consummate professional wouldn’t accept, and though none of us are sure if he is motivated by financial drive or simply by love of his craft, it’s hard to get Tim Curry to pass on a project. He’s like the opposite of H. Jon Benjamin.

But there are things he’ll refuse to do. And it turns out that asking him to portray a bear version of Hitler who cleanses a forest of rabbits who are thinly veiled stand-ins for Jews in a picture which is “like Shortbus without the positive energy or accepting message” is pretty much the line.

What’s more it’ll keep him from ever speaking to you again and make the scheduled coffee meeting you have with him (which he’ll still keep to because he’s such a classy gent) that much more awkward. We hope you’re pleased with yourself and that you enjoy featuring Mark Ruffalo in that role instead, since there’s literally nothing that asshole won’t do for money.

Congratulations on Alienating Tim Curry!