Big cats ride horses and ponies all the time. Big fucking deal! They’ve got claws and huge brains and great balance. Fuck off, big cats!
What’s really impressive is shit riding on big cats that already ride on other shit. Like, let’s say a tiger is riding on a rhino in some rich dude’s zoo somewhere in Southeast Asia. You know what’d be even cooler? If a raccoon was riding on top of that tiger!
And even better, what if that raccoon was you? Sure, you’re just a small town raccoon from just outside Bemidji, but what if? What if today was your day?
Well turns out it will be. Turns out today you’re finally going to get the courage to climb on top of that tiger’s head and sit there on your hind legs in the most adorable pose imaginable while the rhino trots around, kind of angry about the whole thing. And someone’s going to take a picture and post it to their Facebook before they’re executed for taking a photo in the Forbidden Zoo. And then it’ll be in the aether of the webs and it’ll only be a matter of time before you become famous.
Internet famous.
Congratulations on Riding That Tiger!
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