Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Congratulations on Being Flush With Rage!

When he brakes the car too hard water will splash into your face from your water bottle and get into your nose and eyes and make you feel angry and ridiculous and stupid and clumsy and a whole bunch of stuff that you don’t like feeling. You’ll turn to him full of fury and won’t say anything. You’ll just sit there and look at him like you could burn him alive with your eyes.

He’ll do his best not to notice, but everyone walking by will be. It won’t be because your rage is particularly profound or interesting. It won’t even be because you’re that angry. It’ll be because you are radiantly and profoundly beautiful while angry.

Your cheeks will puff up and blush cherry, your eyes suddenly vibrantly attentive and slitted to accentuate your rage. Your lips will puff out in a facsimile of a frown which is actually more a pout than anything else and your fold your arms so they push your breasts up for all the world to admire.

It’ll be good that he doesn’t turn and look, because a driver distracted by your beauty at this moment might well end up in an accident. So the relationship defense mechanism that forces his eyes forward and his mouth closed for the next three blocks will do more than just save your relationship. It’ll save your lives.

And you get that look all the time. This was just a chance for everyone to enjoy it.

Congratulations on Being Flush With Rage!

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